So I have this reoccurring dream. For the majority of my life, I never had a dream happen so many times that it was clearly something to it. The dream is always either me in elementary, high school, or college. I'll be sitting in a class or walking in a hallway stressed because I skipped to many classes or failed some and didn't graduate.
Now on the surface, I was beginning to wonder if subconsciously regret not finishing college. Mind you, I never once regret leaving, or ever wondered if my life would be better if I submitted to the exact wishes of my parents and became an engineer as they wanted. I never looked back at that day with any remorse. So I investigated it further because I read once, dreams are messages from your subconscious that are not literally what they appear, but more symbolic about a current event in your life. So I had my friend's mom who was an expert on the subject help me interpret it.
From everything I told her, about how for the past year or two I have been experiencing this dream reoccurring to me and the specifics of the most recent one. Mind you, up until now, I looked at dreams as random thoughts in my head going off while I slept. Almost all the time they never make any sense. It's almost like ADHD isn't gone while you sleep. However, as vague as the interpretation was I felt like it hit the spot on something I was consciously dealing with in reality. She said, "your a prisoner of yourself. You have unfinished business. You're keeping yourself busy with things that seem important at the time but really lead to nothing. You're holding yourself back from doing what you need to do to achieve your bigger goal. You have to step by step set goals.
Might sound like a fortune cookie, and maybe it's just a coincidence, and maybe whether destiny is telling me so, or random chance just made me aware of it, there is something lingering in reality that I feel I have been holding myself on. Lately, my DJ/mix artistry career has been doing well. I can relax a bit, pick and choose when I work, and get to travel and explore cities. I don't have a weekly residency and for the past 6 months, I haven't needed it. Bookings throughout the month seem to be abundant enough that I can share them. My workload has been based on maintaining that consistency of gigs. Promotional video, recaps, and ads, as well as downloading tracks and keeping social media content fresh. However, what got me to this point was never because of how well I DJed or how my personality impressed upon people. My DJing can be good to some, and not to all, and my personality is not exactly the party animal.
At the very core of things, I got here because at some point, someone listened to music I made, actually liked it, and brought me over. Every successful DJ/mix artist/producer got to where they are because of the music they made. They have said that in interviews, and proved it on Forbes. A great night at the club is not a tangible item people become fans for. But a song is. It's something they can play over and over beyond the dancefloor. It's the extension of your brand.
This core principle about success in the DJ/producer/mix artist world is something I have been neglecting. I found excuses like, "my PC crashed and I don't know how to use the new programs on the Mac". I have no excuse, I have made my bedroom production ready with all the toys in the house interconnected with two USB hubs and 5 MIDI controllers. I learned how to use Adobe Premiere for my videos at satisfaction level in the span of 3 months. But for some reason, I have been laying off on learning Ableton Live. Deep down inside, it's already proven to me that this is the real key to my long term success and that I have been dabbling in trailer videos and keeping myself relevant for immediate reward in the nightlife; totally neglecting the one thing that would grow and secure long term success.
I think it's time I stop fooling myself. All the eggs are in place. Been eat healthier, cut back on bad habits, and improving relationships around me. While the immediate things are important, I can no longer be using them as an excuse. Like Will Smith said, "it's easier to be ready than to get ready." Here we go Ableton, for the next two months, let's sound like crap until I get it right.
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